Saturday, May 07, 2005

Joshua and Rosa: A Love Story (Part 7)

With their family settling in together nicely, Rosa’s thoughts turned towards her husband’s feelings. For weeks after John’s birth, Joshua didn’t touch her in an intimate way and Rosa began to fret that perhaps her now being the mother of his child had made it hard for him to think of her as a woman to be held and made love to. This was, of course, not outside of her experience…many men in her home town, including her father, sought passion somewhere outside the marriage bed…but the thought of Joshua lying with prostitutes or, even worse, a mistress was not something Rosa wanted to dwell upon for long.

Joshua, for his part, did feel somewhat conflicted. Rosa was the mother of his child now and a part of him…a foolish part to be sure…found it wrong to think of her as just a passionate woman. But, in time, he pushed past that notion…he loved Rosa too much, desired her too much, to not touch her in the ways a man touched his woman. One quiet night, long weeks after John’s birth, he found the courage to reach over and touch her thigh, feeling a wave of relief when Rosa sighed passionately rather than shied away. They didn’t speak to each other; Joshua rolled over and kissed his wife with all the passion that had gone untapped for so long…and she responded in kind.

Rosa put her arms around her husband’s sturdy neck, luxuriating in his touch as his hands pushed up her nightgown and began to explore her body. She delighted in once more feeling the weight of her husband’s strong body as he mounted her and joined with her for the first time in what seemed like ages. She delighted as her body responded in kind to his ardor, feeling happily again Joshua’s woman and not just the mother of his son.

Joshua came to something of a turning point in his relationship to his John one hot afternoon. He’d been working in the barn and he came in to the house to get a drink. Rosa was making biscuits and her hands were covered with dough. John was in his bassinet in the next room. After washing his hands and getting a drink of water, Joshua was about to go back out to work when John started to fuss. Joshua immediately looked over at Rosa but she held up her dough-covered hands and looked at him pleadingly.

Joshua took a deep breath and went to the bassinet. The baby was wet that much he could see right away. Joshua had watched the boy being changed a few times but he had never done it himself. John, for his part, quieted when he saw his father and waited. Joshua very gingerly picked up the boy and put him on the changing table that he had built for Rosa. His hands shaking somewhat, he carefully went through the process of changing the diaper. John, as if he sensed the older man’s discomfort, was patiently quiet throughout the process. Rosa, for her part, smiled knowingly as she continued to knead her dough, stealing loving, watchful glances at the scene but careful not to be caught looking so as not to make Joshua anymore self-conscious than he already was.

When Joshua was done, John’s diaper was a little askew but it was on securely. Joshua lifted the boy, who was still looking at his father with bright, patient eyes, and put him back into the bassinet. Joshua looked over at Rosa who nodded and smiled knowing that any reaction greater than that would only make the man even more self-conscious than he already was. Joshua mumbled something and left to return to the barn. Once outside, he allowed himself a smile of pride and accomplishment.

John grew strong though he continued to befuddle his parents with his even, thoughtful disposition that rarely broke for tears or smiles. When the boy was six weeks old, Joshua announced that they were going to go visit Rosa’s hometown that her parents might be introduced to their grandson.

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